Originally posted on Thursday, November 5, 2009
Okay, so I have been looking for an opportunity to blog this concept for years. Finally, in the Epistle of James, we get to talk squarely about our behavior.
Our behavior . . . that is, all of which can be boiled down to what comes out of our mouths. You can be full of good works, good ideas, even good results. But that all can be ruined by what you say. You can destroy years of preparation and effort by making one unwise remark to someone else. And retrieving an ill-advised remark, as someone once said, can be like casting to the wind, the contents of a feather pillow, and then trying to restore all of the feathers back to the pillow. It can't be done. Much damage comes from your mouth.
This morning, I was reminded of this in a 6th grade classroom. A teacher had a poster on the board, that said, "If you always tell the truth, you'll never have to remember what you said." I heard this first, years ago, when Jay Leno made the comment in regard to Hillary Clinton's comment that she could not recall what was said about the Whitewater scandal.
I would venture to say that, a great majority of what we say in the course of a day, should not be said. If you even stop yourself before talking, and think "Should I say this?" chances are you should not say it. And most of what we say is probably harmful - we are just so used to saying whatever we want, that we no longer think of it as harmful.
A good acquaintance of mine has to make some remark about almost everyone she sees, or whose name comes up in conversation. It will always be about how the person looks, or what the other person believes. Often, the tone is mocking. You plant an idea in someone else's mind about how someone else looks "funny," or "strange," or "old," or "awful," and you have planted a seed that will surely germinate. You have spread your demeaning attitude to someone else. Like a virus, it grows.
As a church music director, one that leads the congregation in praise and worship, I have to be careful what I say, or think. And I wish others would be careful about that as well. You should not plant gossipy, or harmful, or hateful thoughts into the minds of others, especially those that are charged with leading the flock.
Whereas wisdom from above is first of all decent; besides that, it's peace-loving, reasonable, willing to go along, full of compassion and good results, steady of purpose and sincere.
My Dad has a refrain, when it comes to handiwork around the house. The solution to every problem, be it installing some equipment, repairing a machine, fixing a leak, driving a nail or turning a screwdriver, is to "do it on an angle." You can even say to him "do it on an angle," and he'll treat you like you're a genius the rest of the day. He is talking about handling a tool so that you get maximum leverage.
Why don't we do our relationships "on an angle"? Using our mouth wisely, we can create better leverage over the well-being of others. We can make them feel better. We can encourage them. We can lead them closer to Christ. But the mouth, according to James, has great leverage. The tongue, though small, is the most influential organ in your entire body.
If those around us are happy; if Christ is primary in your home; if you are getting good results with your family and friends, then chances are you have tamed your tongue. You are leveraging the goodness of good and wise words. You are living your life "at an angle."
2019 Addendum - And now . . . you can post unwise words on the World Wide Web, where they become permanently accessible. Do you really want to write that? In five years, will you feel good when Facebook Memories on this Day reminds you of the temporary bad mood, to which you've just given an unending life?
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